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"The Creation Of A Paramedic" When God made Paramedics He was into His sixth day of overtime. An angel appeared and said, "You're doing a lot of fiddling around on this one." God said, "Have you read the specs on this one? A Paramedic has to be able to carry an injured person up a wet, grassy hill in the dark, dodge stray bullets to reach a dying child unarmed, enter homes the health inspector wouldn't touch, and not wrinkle their uniform." "They has to be able to lift three times their own weight, crawl into wrecked cars with barely enough room to move, and console a grieving mother as they are doing CPR on a baby they know will never breathe again." "They have to be in top mental condition at all times, running on no sleep, black coffee and half-eaten meals and they have to have six pairs of hands." The angel shook her head slowly and said, "Six pairs of hands...no way." "It's not the hands that are causing me problems," God replied. "It's the three pairs of eyes a medic has to have." "That's on the standard model?" asked the angel. God nodded. "One pair that sees open sores as they're drawing blood, always wondering if the patient is HIV positive." "Another pair here in the side of their head for theirpartner's safety and another pair of eyes here in front that can look reassuringly at a bleeding victim and say "You'll be alright ma'am" when they know it isn't so." "Lord," said the angel, touching His sleeve, "rest and work on this tomorrow." "I can't," God replied. "I already have a model that can talk a 250 pound drunk out from behind a steering wheel without incident and feed a family of five on a private service paycheck." The angel circled the model of the Paramedic very slowly. "Can it think?" she asked. "You bet", God said. "It can tell you the symptoms of 100 illnesses; recite drug calculations in it's sleep; intubate, defibrillate, medicate, and continue CPR nonstop over terrain that any doctor would fear....and it still keeps it's sense of humor." "This medic also has phenomenal personal control. They can deal with a multi-victim trauma, coax a frightened elderly person to unlock their door, comfort a murder victim's family. And then read in the paper how Paramedics were unable to locate a house quickly enough, allowing the person to die. A house that had no street sign and no house numbers." Finally, the angel bent over and ran her finger across the cheek of the Paramedic. "There's a leak," she pronounced. "I told You that You were trying to put too much into this model." "That's not a leak," God replied, "It's a tear." "What's the tear for?" asked the angel. "It's for bottled up emotions, for patients they've tried in vain to save, for commitment to that hope that they will make a difference in a person's chance to survive." "What a wonderful feature Lord, you're a genius" said the angel. God looked somber and said "I didn't put it there". Author: Unknown

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