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About

Born in 1837, I fell into a vat of radioactive tapioca pudding on my third birthday. This gave me the power to shoot flames out of my testicles. It hurts. A lot.

Education

  • Purdue University Fort Wayne
  • Penn High School

Favorite saying

  • "War. War never changes. Since the dawn of human kind, when our ancestors first discovered the killing power of rock and bone, blood has been spilled in the name of everything, from God to justice to simple, psychotic rage."

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